Change the Way You Think About Self-Care Forever! Join the Free, Five Day Sustainable Self-Care Challenge Today.
Courses Podcast Blog About JOIN THE MEMBERSHIP Login
BLOG

BLOG

BLOG

NO (to the No, to the NO, NO, NO)

(Anyone else singing the Megan Trainor song right now?  Because I honestly can't even help it.) 

NO. 

I don't know about you, but this simple little word can be really hard for me to say. I have this fear that goes like this... What does it mean about me if I say no? Does it mean that I'm selfish or a bitch or uncaring? 

I know that I have a tendency to derive my worth from helping others. That my service - to my clients, to my community, to the world - is fundamental to my sense of identity. But I can also see the truth that my ego's need to feel important and needed can be HARMFUL to me. It can lead to me feeling exhausted - emotionally, physically, and mentally. And not for nothing, but this need to feel important and needed has also done a disservice to the people I think I'm helping because there have definitely been moments in which I have shown up so exhausted, half-assed, distracted, and scattered. There have been times when no matter how hard I have tried, my energy was just so drained and depleted that I really didn't have much to give. 

In the past, I have given my time and energy to others out of a sense of obligation in a way that feels fundamentally, energetically out of balance. 

So, I'm officially rewriting the story of what it means for me to say no. When I say no, what it says about me is that I respect myself enough to set healthy boundaries that protect my most important resources - my time and my energy. When I say no, what it says about me is that I respect YOU enough to have the courage to say no if I know I can't give you my full attention because you deserve someone who's all in. You deserve so much more than my exhausted, half-assed, "I just said yes because I felt obligated to" energy. 

Is saying NO hard for you, too? What makes it easier? 

*************************************************************************

If saying no and establishing healthy boundaries is a challenge for you, I invite you to join us inside the Self-Care Redefined Membership for more conversation about the 3 B's of Self-Care (Beliefs, Behaviors, and Boundaries) and how to make them work for you. Learn more and join us at www.maryallisonbrown.com/membership

PREVIOUS POSTS

Fear

Worthiness

Close

LOVE THIS THEME?

ENTER FOR THE OPPORTUNITY
TO WIN A FREE THEME!